Archive for January, 2008

Oh to be one of those girls… 

I want to be an AP girl so badly, but there’s no way I can afford to be before tax season is over.  I want to have items like above to hold up my hosiery, sexy coverups for around the house, and just all the fun stuff they have for under my clothes to make me feel that much more sexy…

I had the pleasure of attending the Grand Opening here in Vancouver back on January 18, 2008. It was amazing and something I will always remember - it was how an opening should be.

My boss asked me to set up and test a view things for him.  I just had the pleasure of testing out his myvu solo plus edition.  This is a pretty cool little contraption for those of you that travel.  You just put on Star Trek-esque glasses, plug in you ipod or iphone and away you go!  The screen you view on is still roughly the same size as you’d find on your device, but at least now it’s right in front of you (the glasses come with attached earbuds). 

I must say, I am pretty impressed.   

Is there a point in waiting, even when you don’t know if what you’re waiting for may happen?  It’s almost as though you’re waiting in line to see a show that you’re not even sure is going to play.  You know the show will be amazing, so amazing that you could wait forever it seemed for it.  But is there a point in waiting for a show that may never begin?  Waiting for the amazing show would so be worth it, yet on the same note is it worth missing the possible life that passes you by as you wait?  The puppy love teenagers, the newly engaged couple, the bliss of not having yet come down from a honeymoon, the couple pushing a stroller with a newborn…  

“I’m practicing my patience” she said.  ”What does that mean?” he asked back.  ”It means I’m not going to jump into anything too soon, that I’m going to take my time with people and with life.”  ”You’ve been practicing your patience for two and a half months now, isn’t that long enough?”  She paused for a moment then answered, “No.”.  The more he seemed to pull away, the more she thought if what she was doing was right.  Was she waiting for nothing?  Is what she is holding out for actually going to happen, or will she have just wasted all this time.  ’This is not a waste of time, it’s called being patient and that’s never an easy thing to do, that’s why they say patience is a virtue.’  She repeated that to herself over and over, but for some reason it didn’t make her feel any better.  If only there were some sort of reassurance, some sort of sign.  Anything to make her smile and let that flame burn again…

I feel really good!  Energized and great.  Lately I’ve been used to maybe eating 1 time a day with some snacks here and there but today I followed the plan and had a little something every 3 hours.  I feel more full more than anything, but I guess I will just have to wait and see how my measurements turn out tomorrow. I took a before picture, will post onto this entry once I upload… 

I watched a movie tonight called “The Ten” it was pretty interesting and had a lot of good humor in it (by good humor I mean stuff that makes me laugh but may not necessarily make others laugh). One thing I told myself I needed to do was see if I could find the “Lying Rhino” clip on YouTube. Well I have, and here it is - check it out!

I’ve decided to start me two week program again starting tomorrow.  This program is going to kick my butt into more than just better fitness, I find it also brings me more confidence, organization and also helps me to be more responsible.I decided to make an entry regarding this because it puts it out there and not only will I now be having to prove to myself that I can do this, I now must prove it to everybody.Starting tomorrow I will be exercising every day.  45 minutes of cardio and well as extra exercise activities.  I will be following a strict diet that has me eating three meals and two snacks (basically every three hours).  There is a strict A,B,C,D,E,F rule: A = No Alcohol, B = No Bread, C = No Starchy Carbs, D = No Dairy, E = No Extra Sweets, and F = No Fruit.I’m really excited for the plan, I’ve done it before last year around this time and I lost 14 lbs, I only gained about 5 of those back throughout the entire year.  I’ll also be forcing myself to post photos of my progress so that will also encourage me to stay on track.Wish me luck!   

This has got to be one of my all-time favorite songs from the last six months of my life. Cedric Gervais - Spirit In My LifeYou hurt me time and time again I lived in sadness You walked away and didn’t care Just look inside me You knew that I’d be there Always around you And now the sides have turned To understand me You used to be all out of love Now I can’t stand you You called me twice to say you’re wrong What do you want from me? Just try to make it on your own You’re fine without me Cause now the sides have turned To understand me I lost the spirit in my life, and now you know just how it feels I lost the spirit in my life, the day that you walked out on me I lost the spirit in my life, and now you know just how if feels I lost the spirit in my life, but I’ll come back again  

For anyone out there in cyberspace who read my blog, I woke up this morning and thought I should just mention a little something. When I write pieces that seem emotionally strong, such as poetry or random lash-out thoughts it’s because I am feeling very strongly at that particular time and need a form of release.  Very soon after writing whatever I had just written I feel calm and fine and back to normal.  Part of me feels like deleting previous posts where I have been really emotional, but since this site currently is about me, I may as well keep those posts as they were a part of me at some point.Happy Reading. 

Lately I have found myself to be emotional.  I try to pull strength from my patience ring but even that now at times I find hard.  Some tell me I am going through a lot, but in my mind I do not feel that I am.  Yes my 93 year old grandfather is in the hospital.  Yes work has been really busy for me.  Yes my life has been going through some changes.  I don’t know if I should feel guilty though that the main though occupying my mind is none of the above.  I feel so helpless.  I feel so left out and as if I don’t matter almost.  I know that I DO matter, but I just feel like so much has been left unsaid and it makes me wonder why it has been left unsaid and what is needing to be said that is not… ”I’m just going to put this out there…  I want to be on you”.